These past few weeks have been quite difficult. First, my wondering of where i had gotten in life left me enrolling in a small college program, after the hussle and hassle of all that i felt a little accomplished. Second, battering battle again leaves me confused and discouraged, my husband quit his job of two years, this has once again put my life on hold.. i now will figure out a financial dilema that we have accured. Third, Interview of interview for him have us wondering if jobs are ever going to hire. My anniversary of 4 years of marriage will be at the end of June, and what's a girl to do.. how do you celebrate something that has been such a battle?
My mind dose not work properly anymore, i find myself trying to figure a plan out for our hecktic agenda and yet wind up merely confused as where i should start.
My Children have been giving me a little more than problems lately, some say it's the age, or the new adjustment; I say it's the timing.. they know when to push buttons, when mommy's completley out of her elements... what do you think? there kids heck do they have that ability to know when things are going compeltley wrong? Do they mean to push and push? I have yet to figure that one out.
Simple things have me upset, for instance, looking at my car mileage yesterday really upset me, i bought the car with 140,000 miles and have owned it for 6 months, i bought it because supposidly lexus have the ability to be driven if tooken car of for up to 300,000 miles.. in six months i have put over 30,000 miles i am now at 176,000 miles only because i am the shoufer the one with the reliable vehicle. I feel used when i look at the mileage.. see, simple things like that upset me.
Being that my husband is TEMP OFF WORK, i feel that some of the chores around the house he could help with instead, once again i feel like i still hold my own weight.
To simply sit here and bitch does noithing for my self esteem or my mentailty.. i am the only one who can change the way i feel, only i control my emotions.. but how do i do that??
For now, Leah
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You are so right. Bitching does not help anyone and rarely is listened to by the bitched at person. I know I try not to do it and go for a whole day sometimes. I love the person I bitch to and feel secure in that I can bitch to him and he will still love me.
ReplyDeleteThen I feel guilty and know that he is my only real comfort and support in what is bothering me.
So how do you stop that?
I know the Bible study we did on Sunday at Church talked about being mean to people and saying things that hurt people. Why do we?
I think again it is a release of emotions and we do it only when we feel we are safe with that person. So it is really a compliment when we bitch to our loved one. Right?
Well, I can tell you no one likes to be bitched at either. I have done some study on that. Have been the bitched at as well as the bitcher.
Why can't we take one day at a time and live as thought that day is our last? Then we would not bitch, I betcha. Not if we knew we had to face God at the end of that day. Right?
I know I would be on my best behavior.
So this is an ongoing issue with me too.
Let us both resolve to try it a day as though it were our last one. I will if you will.
Love,
Lois